A Sanctuary...

During a phone conversaton with the head of my sanctuary, The Sanctuary of Thoth, I was asked how I felt about founding a Sanctuary here in Colorado once I've been initiated into the Zelator degree. My brother let me know I had been been chosen as a worthy candidate to become a priest of Ra.

This is the spark I needed right when I needed. To stop, rethink what is important and further commit myself. I am a student, and a teacher. These are what I have come to recogize as the key ingrediants of my natural orbit, and to have the opportunity to further bring my practice of Thelema into line with that, well it's natural really. No surprises, but further validation of my path's evolution.

I will not be communicating any of those plans, or even the ideas of name, structure, web page etc. until I have attained the Zelator grade, and the Sanctuary has its charter. 93 93/93

THE ADORATION

Unity uttermost showed!
I adore the might of Thy breath,
Supreme and Terrible God,
Who makest the gods and death
To tremble before Thee:
--I, I adore Thee!

Appear on the throne of Ra!
Open the ways of the Khu!
Lighten the ways of the Ka!
The ways of the Khabs run through
To stir me or still me!
Aum! let it fill me!

The light is mine; its rays consume
Me: I have made a secret door
Into the House of Ra and Tum,
Of Khephra and of Ahathoor.
I am thy Theban, O Mentu,
The prophet Ankh-af-na-khonsu!

By Bes-na-Maut my breast I beat;
By wise Ta-Nech I weave my spell.
Show thy star-splendour, O Nuit!
Bid me within thine House to dwell,
O wingèd snake of light, Hadit!
Abide with me, Ra-Hoor-Khuit! (From Liber Legis, Ch. III, vs. 37-38)

The "Do" in "Do What Thou Wilt" - Revisited

A few months back I in my The "Do" in "Do What Thou Wilt" entry, I spoke of working some techniques into my ritual to banish certain indecisive or apathetic sides of my personality. The whole object of magick is to harness one's powers, integrate the self, and to steer one's life consciously, to manifest one's Will.

Since then I have done a lot of thought and research about my post-grad work and the University prospects for me after graduation. History is saturated, and now after years of study I still can't say I've found a period I truly want to immerse myself in and make my specialty.

After soul searcing I relized my Classics minior is what I've always felt passionate about, only I let the extra post-grad language requirement of Ancient Greek hold me back. The study of Rome and Greece, especially Rome is what gets me off.

I make an appointment with my Classics advisor, and lo and behold: I only need one more classice class to graduate with that degree as well this year! What a wonderful example of the "Every man and woman is a Star" concept. With all the plotting and planning I've done to meet the degree requirements for History, my natural tendencies, or "my natural orbit" drew me towards fulfilling my degree requirements for Classics.

Since I've declared the major everything has just clicked into place, I feel like I have just stepped into a river whose current is strong, and is taking me where I want to go. Whereas, up to this time I have felt like I am swimming against the current with an unsure destination. This is the results of the seeds I have been planting, of my ritual, and the self-discovery which is blossoming as a result of that.

Hadit travels in his natural orbit within Nuit, it is the balance of these two micro/macrocosmic pricipals with brings about the child, or manifestation.
...None, breathed the light, faint & faery, of the stars, and two.

For I am divided for love's sake, for the chance of union.

This is the creation of the world, that the pain of division is as nothing, and the joy of dissolution all.

For these fools of men and their woes care not thou at all! They feel little; what is, is balanced by weak joys; but ye are my chosen ones. Liber AL vel Legis: 28-31

The Ordeals

I have not done a blog in some time, and my practice has also been sporatic for the last two months. There is much to write about, so I will break this up into three entries over the next three days. Today I will write of my ordeals.

Once school started back up again I began to really have to wrestle with myself, my own inner demons to persist in my practice. School is not the reason for this, but the ideal excuse to empower my ego. I have been addressing this problem within myself all during this degree. I touched on it in the Battle Cry entry.

However, I was looking at it as "my problem," something unique to me in a type of self depreciating way. Upon speaking with the head of my Sanctuary last night I realized that this is the ordeals of the lower grade. I hit my head and just went DUH!!!! The will to perservere, to aknowledge and check the ego, to train my will to see through the ego's veil. To some extent I have to welcome these obstacles as symbols of progress, the actuality of my path, so to speak.

In the Thelemic Golden Dawn (T.·.G.·.D.·.) we view Thelemic Initiation itself as a Spiritual War or personal battle with the self/ego/ruach. The Initiate of the Thelemic Golden Dawn is therefore consecrated as a Warrior of Horus, whose only Weapon is the Sword of Thelema, to conquer the real enemy within -- the self. Even the so-called enemy without is but a symbol for the true enemy within. In our Thelemic Philosophy the enemy without is actually looked upon as a focal point and means for conquering the true enemy within. It is a Spiritual War, an Internal Combat for Self-Control, Self-Liberation and Self-Illumination. David Cerubim, The Warrior of Thelema